Sure, let’s give this horoscope section a more colloquial and authentic touch. Here’s the revised content:
Aries (March 21 – April 19)
Tarot: Judgment
Lenormand: Fish
Oracle: Shamrock
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
This week is like a emotional rollercoaster, with a surge in feelings and inspirations. Expect a mix of high and low moods, especially in communication and short trips. The first half of the week brings a financial windfall, particularly for those in the service industry. New projects might kick off around the 9th, thanks to the new moon. But watch out, as the second half could bring some frustration and things from the past might resurface. Be patient in your interactions.
Emotional Tip: Keep it simple, stupid (KISS).
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
Tarot: Swords Ten
Lenormand: Mountain
Oracle: Chili Pepper
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
This week, you might feel a bit isolated in a group or team, despite your efforts to engage. You’re giving a lot, but not getting much in return. The first half is about being generous and thoughtful without expecting anything back. Professionally, you’re calm and collected, pushing boundaries and aiming for the future. The second half sees your leaders winning over hearts and expanding your wealth, with some investment in marketing and promotions.
Emotional Tip: The more you’re tortured, the more you love.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
Tarot: Wands Six
Lenormand: Whip
Oracle: Marigold
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
This week is all about socializing, technology, and group activities, which will really push you to your limits. The first half is busy but rewarding, with growth in social and professional circles. The second half, while you’re making great strides and getting along well with your team, the workload might feel overwhelming, and some might even consider quitting.
Emotional Tip:orgasmic
Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
Tarot: Queen of Swords
Lenormand: Key
Oracle: Lemon
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
Your social circle is expanding, and your career is on an upswing, making you busier than ever. The first half brings friends from afar, boosting your work and business prospects. The second half sees your social life broadening, but your personal time might be disrupted by unexpected events. You’re handling it all gracefully, though.
Emotional Tip: Prioritize your tasks.
Leo (July 23 – August 22)
Tarot: World
Lenormand: Garden
Oracle: Chives
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
This week is about long-distance travel, higher education, and exploration. Focus on relationships and information exchange. The first half might see you starting or ending an overseas business or relationship. The second half could bring financial constraints, with some resorting to crowdfunding or donations.
Emotional Tip: Blessed by the heavens and everyone around.
Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
Tarot: Knight of Swords
Lenormand: Bouquet
Oracle: Peppermint
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
Money matters are keeping you busy, with focus on investments and loans. The first half is good for your finances, with stable assets and a new financial plan on the horizon. The second half sees some of you heading out for work, while others are busy at home.
Emotional Tip: Take the initiative / Aim high / Celebrate victory
Libra (September 23 – October 22)
Tarot: King of Cups
Lenormand: Garden
Oracle: Cucumber
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
Married couples are doing great, while singles need to be careful. Workers are full of energy and creativity. The first half is good for relationship upgrades, with proposals and weddings. The second half is about working hard for long-term goals, with less time for leisure.
Emotional Tip: Keep your cool / Protect your relationship
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
Tarot: Page of Swords
Lenormand: Moon
Oracle: Sweet Corn
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
You’re shining at work, using your smarts to handle busy schedules. Focus on money and finances. The first half is good for job seekers, with new offers on the horizon. The second half is great for partnerships and marriage, with a positive outlook for business growth.
Emotional Tip: Maintain your emotions / Cherish
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
Tarot: Pope
Lenormand: Tower
Oracle: Marigold
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
Your career is looking up, with increased income and potential for an ex to return. Focus on family and partnerships. The first half brings family support and breakthroughs in relationships. The second half is enjoyable at work, but there might be some family tension that needs addressing.
Emotional Tip: Elderly approval / Official stamp
Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)
Tarot: Seven of Cups
Lenormand: Fox
Oracle: Grapes
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
Family life is harmonious, with potential for new additions or moving to a new place. The first half is great for family and wealth. The second half requires careful communication, both at work and at home.
Emotional Tip: Daydreaming
Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)
Tarot: Six of Swords
Lenormand: Bird
Oracle: Violet
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
Friendships are strong and active, but money is tight. Focus on entertainment and love. The first half is all about enjoying time with friends and supporting family members financially. The second half might see you struggling with finances, needing to rely on credit cards or loans.
Emotional Tip: Don’t be unfaithful / Avoid impulsive breakups
Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
Tarot: Seven of Pentacles
Lenormand: Moon
Oracle: Chives
April 7-13 Weekly Forecast:
Money is good, and your social circle is wide, with potential for financial gains from friends. Focus on family, children, and. The first half is about active communication and starting new projects. The second half sees you asserting authority at home and being strict with your kids.
Emotional Tip: Confident of victory
This rewrite aims to make the horoscopes sound more like friendly advice from a knowledgeable friend, with a touch of humor and personal anecdotes thrown in for good measure.
